Maybe I should consider myself lucky that rare now is the occasion I view alcohol in a positive light. The trouble drinking has caused in my own life, the trauma experienced by my family, and the constant struggle I see from others in my advocacy overwhelm any craving or thoughts of alcohol having even a slight social benefit.
It wasn’t always this way, in early sobriety I longed to be “normal”, to have a life that involved coming home from a hard day’s work to a nice cold beer. In my mind alcohol was both a staple and a panacea, as if all things goods were fermented, not earned. Long after the physical craving for alcohol vanished the mental and emotional desire remained. It was indicative of my pathetic life as an alcoholic; that I still desired to drink despite the damage it had caused- mainly because it was the only reward my brain even recognized! Maybe my rather jaded view of drinking these days is the sign of a healthy recovery, knowing the risks and dependable negative results by far outweigh any benefits. It’s as if those pages of my mind have been stripped and replaced with a healthier, more wholesome edition… ergo, a new term for TDA: The J Geils Effect(Get it?).