I think we have a need in recovery to try to simplify addiction, and to simplify recovery, and try to put them in a neat little box and say “This is how everyone should recover, if everyone would just do it this way then they would stay sober, because that worked for me.”

It is a fear based argument that tries to simplify the recovery process. But I agree with you, that it is complex, and therefore requires serious effort and huge commitment.

In early recovery, resentment is probably still “the number one offender.” But anyone who is actually doing the footwork in recovery and making an effort to improve their life should start to overcome those resentments and learn to let them go. Sure, we can encounter new problems in recovery, but for those who are really growing, strong resentment should become less and less of a problem. I know this has been true for me, and I have learned how to let my anger slide quite a bit in recovery. I am no longer “knocked off my square” by things that used to be able to keep me angry for weeks or even months. This is growth.

So the real threat, for me, becomes complacency over time. You stay clean and eventually you are entering into “mature recovery.” When things are going too good, there is the threat of no longer “doing the work,” meaning, doing what we need to do in order to stay spiritually fit in recovery. So I would agree that the idea of a sliding scale really does exist, and the biggest threat for newcomers is not going to be the same as it is for oldtimers.

But of course, the solution always seems to be action.

Thank you so much for allowing me to guest post here on TDA. This website is awesome!

I especially like the distinction between sobriety and recovery, the emphasis on action, and the warning concerning complacency. The fundamentals are sound and this is one of the best recovery posts I’ve seen in a while but I would find it personally interesting though, to see if you thought about a possible sliding scale of the dangers of resentment and complacency relative to early sobriety and mature recovery.