You will hear and see it from college students, adults who refuse to grow up, and even sometimes around the coffee pot of a recovery meeting. Like a murder of crows, we will congregate to swap war stories of how drunk or how high we had been and try to one-up each other with tales of the horrendous results that almost always ensue after such death-wish antics. I began reflecting upon this type of behavior after reading a blog-gasconade titled “The Drunkest Night of my Life” and found myself chuckling at the self flagellating tone of the post and grimacing at the thought of ingesting concoctions better suited for furniture stripping.
Unfortunately, I also found myself running through my own old memories with the smug awareness that these boys had a long way to go before they could ever top the asinine behavior of my alcoholic past. Ouch, being in recovery I should know better than to exhibit this same behavior that perpetuates the glorification of alcohol and its effects to the youth of our society.
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Binge drinking and extreme intoxication has almost always been considered a rite of passage for impressionable young adults in our society and the blame can be squarely placed on my shoulders and probably yours. Our drunken and drugged tales often omit the less humorous portions that inevitably include injuries, incarceration, and broken relationships. Not told are the broken promises and missed opportunities or the glorious nights of drinking aborted by violence and death. Yes, I know it is part of growing up and lessons that need to be learned the hard way, but it is also at this age that almost all addictions are formed. Experimenting is one thing, but the idolization and commercialization (think Animal House as a start and go from there- I’m guilty again) of the extremes is just plain unhealthy.
When it comes to such immature crowing, from now on I will take advice from another ebon bird… nevermore.
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I can’t tell you the countless conversations that my brother and I have had about partying like rock stars.
There more messed up, sick or just out of it one of us was…the better the story. I truly don’t know why we get enjoyment out of this type of discussion.
But as you said, it is all glorified talk. I never talk about how horrible I felt about myself the next day or the fact that I wasn’t sure if I would wake up once I went to sleep but didn’t care enough to seek help.
So ya, I have been guilty of this type of talk in the past but I have made a conscious decision not to partake in this type of discussion anymore.
erinsav
http://www.whatwinnersdo.com
both of us carrying through with “nevermore” is a good start.
There was a notable night with my ex-husband and his father and brother, sitting at the bar, drinking, of course, and swapping stories of their most awful drunken antics. The worst part for me as a sober observer was that every story the ex told was a step on the road to my leaving him. I hadn’t left yet, but I was getting closer and closer.
There’s one advantage to swapping out the drunky husband for the junky; junkies are aware that they’re fucked up and very secretive about their using. There’s no swapping of war stories.
P.S.
You’ve been tagged:
http://www.thejunkyswife.com/2007/06/meme-eight-things-about-me.html
but I have never been memmed. I’ll give it a stab tonight but lacking the social circles of those like yourself I’ll be limited in those I can tag.
how often I hear these things in, before, and after meetings.